being a critical bitch

Shhh. Be very quiet. There’s another woman in the client lounge with me, I assume also here for a press check. She weighs about 100 pounds, is wearing skinny-jeans tucked into just-below-the-knee, high-heeled, brown leather boots, a perfectly fitted white turtleneck sweater, and she has flawless hair. She has spread her belongings out on a nearby table, and is surrounded by, among other things, a MacBook Pro, an iPhone, her VW key fob, and some Clinique cosmetics. She is her own walking, talking, marketing cliche. It’s as if she is trying to single-handedly represent her demographic. Since I myself am somewhat clumsy and coarse, I find her Elle Finishing School look very amusing. Also, she has mouse-clicked her way across the world and back without ever touching her keyboard. I think a few of my readers will understand why I find that exasperating.

(I would have properly written “cliche” with the correct accent mark if I had any idea how to do it in Windows)

4 Replies to “being a critical bitch”

  1. RAD!!

    I’ll give you 5 bucks if you ask her if she’s ever had whiskey licked out of her belly button. I bet she hasn’t!
    Here is how you do it… and remember, it’s all in the approach…

    “Hey you… I happened to notice your cool iPhone and I was wondering, have you ever had a guy lick whiskey from your belly button?”

    “um… no.”

    “Me either, but I bet it would sure be a lot of fun!”

    Just like that Kitten… my 5 spot is waiting.


  2. At least she didn’t pull a little dog out of an oversized Louis Viutton bag. (Oh wait, she uses Clinique so maybe it would be Coach or Burberry). Either way, if she didn’t have all these high priced overrated items, how would she know who she is?


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