My friend Scott needs new clothes. Diet, exercise, and pining for a distant girl have left him a few pounds lighter and leaner, and his current wardrobe just doesn’t fit as well any more. So today, we went to the mall.
Dedicated readers of my blog may recall that the last time I kept Scott company on a shopping trip, he bought a bookshelf and I bought a fekking sofa. With that in mind, I told myself that this time there would be NO PEEKING at the women’s wear.
Ladies, did you know that men’s pajama bottoms have pockets? I loves me some pockets! I gleefully (yes, pockets really bring me glee) pointed them out to Scott, who replied, “That’s because men wear more practical clothes.” Which I can’t argue with as a whole, but when, exactly, is a pocket practical while sleeping? Do you put your keys in there? Your wallet? Maybe your favorite Thurman Munson baseball card? I think not.
Final tally: Scott bought a grand total of two pairs of jeans and three very cool pearl-snap shirts (and nearly a cashier’s phone number) while I wound up with a thermal, two Ts, and a pair of pinup-girl-in-a-martini-glass pajama bottoms (with pockets); all from the men’s department.