Men’s Fashion (bonus Leap Year post)

I’m okay with guys wearing low-rise jeans, because this:


is one of my favorite parts of a guy. Assuming he’s in good enough shape to get away with it. But as I walked past a Hollister clone today, I couldn’t help but notice that the male mannequins were wearing jeans so low that… well, those hombres better know a thorough (and gentle) waxing tech.

There was a boy at the bowling alley last night, with baggy-ass, showing-6-inches-of-his-boxers jeans and a crooked baseball cap, and I figured him to be 16 at the most. But he had a 21+ wristband! So here’s a lesson to be learned, fellas: If you want to look younger, dress like an 8-year-old with no access to a mirror. Oh, and a special note to Crooked Hat Guy’s friend: a basketball jersey that comes down to your knees is a DRESS. Stop acting tough, and realize that you’re actually cross-dressing. Badly. Trannies have much better taste than you do.

Enjoy your weekend, folks! I have given myself a full plate of tasks to accomplish. I hope to be all sunshine and flowers when we meet again.

6 Replies to “Men’s Fashion (bonus Leap Year post)”

  1. I think many of the men (and I use the term loosely) who dress in that way are trying to avoid growing up. I think they want to perpetually be 16 so they can avoid adult responsibilities.

    My professor offered something last night in class: She heard on NPR that a recent study shows boys in the junior high age range believe, truly believe, that their on-line gamer scores ‘count’ in life more than their grades. The same age girls, I’m pleased to report, are still very achievement-oriented and believe their grades matter.


  2. Here’s the thing. Low rise in the front may be hot but it inevitably comes with low rise in the back. I just can’t dig the “look at me and ma bad undies” look. And those who don’t wear boxers “crack” me up.


  3. Hey… that picture… the one right above… I’ll have you know that my lower stomach area looked the exact same way for a while.
    I’m pretty sure it was between the ages of 7 and 10.
    I was so damn hot back then!!!
    Let’s just say that all the girls wanted to know what I was packing in my Dukes of Hazard lunch box….


  4. That’s the Adonis muscle! When my little bro asked me what girls thought the HOTTEST part of a guy was, that was my answer. Brad Pitt in Fight Club comes to mind. Delish!


  5. A dress!…awesome. How does a guy put on a basketball/baseball jersey that comes down to his knees and not think he’s wearing a dress?
    Maybe a belt would drive the idea home.
    At country clubs, it’s called “Sun-Dress”.
    Ha! well, if you cant be an athlete, be an athletic supporter. Or just a dick, I guess.


  6. As well you know, I am a fan of the low cut jeans. It’s about comfort. I’ve always liked having my jeans hang off of my hip bones. This often meant my jeans would hang low and look baggy. I was ok with this; I totally lack fashion sense. However, now that I can actually buy a pair of jeans that hang comfortable and look like they fit me right…. Holy crap, I might even find a girlfriend one day.


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