As Scott and I are tooling down the highway on our way to work Monday morning, we see a guy up ahead, standing next to his SUV, which is pulled over on the shoulder. Scott says, â€œThat guy is peeing.â€ â€œNo. He wouldnâ€™t right there. (Guy, who was standing in a traditional peeing stance, but couldnâ€™t possibly have been peeing RIGHT THERE, now very clearly zips up and starts to walk back to the driverâ€™s side of his truck.) DUDE. There is a giant tree TWENTY FEET away.â€ Scott chuckles. â€œI bet he feels MUCH better now.â€ â€œI donâ€™t get it! I mean, this isnâ€™t exactly in the middle of nowhere. The exits are only a MILE apart. I can SEE Target from here!â€
I still donâ€™t understand.
5 Replies to “along the side of the road”
Let’s see: maybe he has an enlarged prostate and had to go, had to go, had to go right [then]. Still, a tree twenty feet away. . . a female couldn’t have gotten away with that. With my luck, a trooper would have come along and I would have been arrested for indecent exposure or something.
To a man, the world is a giant toilet.
I’m just jealous.
All those times we’ve been out on the trail with other jeepers and I hold it til my face is blue and my teeth are floating simply because there is no private place to do my business. I want one of those convenient directional hoses that guys have.
Seems like an odd reason to have penis envy doesn’t it?
Oh manâ€¦ this one time I was leaving Long Beachâ€¦ on my way to Wyoming and I had spent the night before drinking my ass offâ€¦ anyway, I woke up he next morning, pretty hung over so I stop and get this huge coffee, thinking Iâ€™d be out of the city by the time the high level alarm hitâ€¦
Needless to say I hit the Sunday traffic and pulled the same thing that this guy did on the side of your roadâ€¦
In Riverside Californiaâ€¦
I could see 4 Targets, 17 Starbucks, and 3 malls from where I was standingâ€¦ and the traffic was passing at about 5 mphâ€¦
So, I just put my hands on my hips, looked into the distance, and pretended I was a Super Hero. Instead of my cape fluttering in the breeze I was pissing on the side of the freeway, but other than that partâ€¦ my pose was flawless!